Intro
This is a guide that will hopefully make communication quicker by presenting you my interests and limits in an organized fashion. It may give you ideas or help us avoid triggering or complicated topics. This is specifically for scenes where I am the bottom/submissive. If you were interested in me as your top/Domme then check out this one.
Safety
Safe Words
I use the classic stoplight system.
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|
| 🟢 |
Everything is okay. Not used often, but may be used if you ask how I'm doing and I'm partly non-verbal. |
| 🟡 |
Stop and check in. It doesn't mean we have to stop playing, but we may need to ramp down intensity or change activities. |
| 🔴 |
Stop immediately. Check in on what is wrong and my safety. |
I will also use your name instead of yellow/red as a way of getting your attention. If we’re performing a scene where I won’t be able to speak we will need to negotiate non-verbal safe words.
Body
Please be aware of the safe areas for the play you’re interested in. If you’re not aware of what those are, we shouldn’t be playing. I don’t have any chronic issues that would restrict you from playing with any areas, but please check in with me before our scene just in case.
Aftercare
I am not used to receiving aftercare, and am still learning what works best for me. Some light cuddling, water and reassurance is a great place to start.
Interests
Key
Here is a key for what each list means:
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|
| 😍 |
Activities I enjoy and am almost always up for |
| 💬 |
Activities that I enjoy, but require advanced notice or more negotiation |
| ⛔ |
Activities I do not enjoy, and will not consent to |
Bondage
The chain parts of whips and chains
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|
| 😍 |
Restraints and tie downs |
| 💬 |
Gags |
| 💬 |
Rope |
Degradation
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|
| 😍 |
Sexual (slutty, whore, etc...) |
| ⛔ |
Physical/appearance (fat, ugly, etc...) |
Electrical
Danger, danger! High voltage!
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|
| 😍 |
Violet wand |
| 😍 |
Shock collars (neck or thigh) |
Honorifics
Titles and nicknames
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|
| 😍 |
Using most honorifics |
| 😍 |
Using "Daddy" or "Daddie" as an honorific |
| 😍 |
Being referred to with sweet and/or diminutive titles that are feminine or gender neutral ("girl," "puppy," "doll") |
| 💬 |
Honorifics with religious connotation ("Goddess") |
| ⛔ |
Using "Mommy" as an honorific (that’s my title, sorry) |
| ⛔ |
Using honorifics that imply ownership such as "Master" (unless you're actually my owner) |
Impact
Hit me baby one more time
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|
| 😍 |
Bare-handed spanking and punching |
| 😍 |
Biting |
| 😍 |
Scratching |
| 😍 |
Hitting with implements (paddles, canes, floggers, etc) |
| 😍 |
Leaving visible marks in areas that can be covered |
| 💬 |
Slapping |
| 💬 |
Hitting with implements that require safety experience (whips) |
| ⛔ |
Leaving visible marks in areas that are hard to cover (neck, chest, collarbone) |
Pet Play
You and me baby ain’t nothin’ but mammals
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|
| 😍 |
Cages |
| 😍 |
Food bowls |
| 😍 |
Leashes |
| 😍 |
Puppy play |
| 😍 |
Squeaky toys |
| 😍 |
Tails (external) |
| 💬 |
Tails (insertable) |
| 💬 |
Other animal play |
| ⛔ |
Kitten play |
Sex
With a recent STI test, of course
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|
| 😍 |
Sexual teasing (verbal or physical) |
| 😍 |
Giving penetrative sex using my hands |
| 💬 |
Plugs and anal play |
| 💬 |
Receiving penetrative sex using fingers, genitals or toys |
| 💬 |
Giving or receiving oral sex |
| 💬 |
Giving penetrative sex using a strap-on |
| ⛔ |
Topping for penetrative sex using my genitals |
Sharps
You will feel a little pinch
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|
| 😍 |
Clothespins |
| 😍 |
Clothespin zippers |
| 💬 |
Needles |